Because I'm due to deliver in the next two weeks, we've been inundated with well meaning advice. Unfortunately, much of the advice is contradictory and sometimes makes me want to ask "...and you had kids before.... and you're saying this???" And the problem is many a time, you can't tell these people to keep quiet because they're older and the darn Confucian ethic in me reminds me to be respectful to my elders as does the 10 commandments that expects us to honour thy parents.
Usually, I have no issue with that, but sometimes in the face of ludicrous-ness, you want to be rude and tell people to go fly a kite.
So here's what I've been told-
1a. Must swaddle the baby because baby is used to 37 degree temperature and will feel cold.
1b. Baby might be too hot if you swaddle baby and put a hat on baby.
2a. Breastfeed as much as you can but don't be afraid to supplement with formula if it takes too much of a toil on you.
2b. Must breastfeed all the time. Formula no good. You will not love your baby if you give your baby formula.
3a. Feed both at the same time. Saves time, energy and prevents mommy from going insane.
3b. Don't feed both at the same time. They'll kick one another in the head and become stupid!
4a. Allocate one breast to one baby.
4b. Swop one baby from breast to breast every 5 minutes and then repeat with 2nd baby.
5a. Don't use a rocking chair to nurse. Dangerous. You might drop one of the babies on their head.
5b. Use a rocking chair. It's more relaxing. And to make it more relaxing, do it in a quiet corner and drink Milo.
6a. Use the breast pump regularly to establish supply. Also when nipples are too sore for the baby barracudas.
6b. Don't pump. Save the milk for the babies. Otherwise when they want to feed, got no milk.
7a. Nipples don't bleed and crack from nursing. They crack and bleed from yanking the baby off the breast.
7b. Nipples get bleed, crack and get twisted out of shape whatever you do. Just deal.
8a. Nursing's the best thing in the world. It helps you bond with your child and it's good for your child.
8b. How do you bond with your child if your child is chomping on your nipples and they're bleeding and out of shape? Better to go with formula.
9a. Get a twin pram. You'll need to be able to go out on your own.
9b. Don't get a twin pram. You can manoeuvre them easily and you'll die trying.
10a. Go for a C-section. Faster, safer, can choose auspicious date and time.
10b. Don't go for a c-section. It's the doctor's way of conning money out of you. Long time ago, mothers delivered twins naturally all the time!
11a. Sleep baby on the back. Safer.
11b. Sleep baby on the front. They sleep longer.
A lot of this I think boils down to personal preference. The problem is when personal preference is forced upon you and you're forced to make a decision in front of them based on that preference. And then, I get scoffed at, when I do my own research and want to try my own thing, like wanting to establish a feeding schedule rather than feed on demand. So it is frustrating and even more so when you can't smack them over the head and tell them to shut the !@&* up.
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Saturday, June 16, 2007
Helpful advice
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the only one i know about that has been advised by hospitals, doctors, midwives, health associations, etc (UK and US) is 11. - Always sleep baby on the back. Front is for play.
ReplyDeleteAnd i thought swaddling was more to make the baby feel safe and secure, more like in the womb...?
Well, at least it's not the superstitious kind where they tell you not to look at monkeys cos the bubs will end up looking like monkeys...
ReplyDeleteAnd I guess, it helps to remember that advice is... well, exactly that... just advice. You don't have to follow it. I guess it helps to remember that people would only give advice if it worked for them previously or if they are just obnoxious arrogants who don't know what they are talking about. If it comes from experience, well, if you have to, give it a shot and see if it works. If it comes from the latter, then heck with it...
Not everyone has the same experiences and not all babies are the same. the trick is to find moms with babies like yours and see how they coped. Heck, I have 3 and all 3 were/are vastly different... but having been through the first, I figured when to panic and when not to... heh.
Hang in there, and you'll figure it out. Take everything with a pinch of salt... try it or toss it... and if you can, try not to 2nd-guess yourself too much.