In all honesty

There are not enough mums out there who are as honest as Tofu Nation and Project Subrosa.

Why do I say that?

Tofu Nation is honest about not being a perfect mom by modern standards.

A perfect mom by modern standards would only give their child organic food.

A perfect mom would find ways of stimulating the child and there will never be silence.

A perfect mom would relish and revel in her perfect child's existence.

A perfect mom would not let her child watch too much television.

A perfect mom would not admit that some days, she just wants to chuck it, give up, check into a hotel and sprawl onto a bed, eating ice cream.

I know mums who would try to do that. I think some days, when I have the energy, I set out to be such a mom. But when I'm very tired and cannot even form a coherent sentence, any attempt at trying to be a perfect mom goes out the window. On days like that, I'd settle not to have throttled one of my kids in a bid to create some quiet.

And I admit that I send my children off to their grandparents on the weekend just so that I can have some decent sleep.

I look forward to the nap-less days because then, they fall asleep by 7 and Packrat and I can have some precious hours out of the house at dinner or at a movie or be able to have conversation without having to keep a ear out for crying, coughing, vomitting and falling off the bed thuds.

I send them to Chinese class because I don't have enough brain cells in me to try to relearn Chinese so that I can converse with them and teach them the language. Let someone else do it.

I have given them hot dogs for lunch because it is something they will eat and the rest of the day follows with a hot dog grin on their faces.


Project Subrosa is honest about being bored trying to entertain a baby. About feeling guilty at wanting to complain. She admits that some moms just aren't cut out to be stay home moms and that's okay. She drives home the point that a happy mom makes a happy kid.

She resonates with me because I feel the same way and my most notorious battle is with guilt. It also drives me crazy when I meet moms who wax lyrical about motherhood and look at you strange when you complain about being sleep-deprived, bored from playing the same repetitive games with the child, have brain cells disappearing from only chatting with the baby the whole day and realising that the only other conversations you have with other adults revolve around the kids!

It is the start of the weekend today. The house is now quiet because Muffin is asleep and the older two have made their way to their grandparents.

What I intend to do with this quiet?

Lie down, close my eyes and just sleep, uninterrupted.

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