There have been quite a few mums talking blogging about being Full Time Working Moms and how they juggle their jobs, their kids and their lives. I'm not sure I qualify as a Full Time Working Mom because I don't clock regular 9-5 hours but my days are packed full and I have to actively carve out portions of time for the children.
Those portions of time are known as 'protected time' by my bosses and they know that should they hazard to call during those times, they are likely to get an Ondine who is frazzled, stand off-ish and makes no qualms about sounding like she needs to get off the phone. The nature of my job can end up with me working round the clock even if I don't head into the office; that is why the 'protected time' is necessary.
Unfortunately, there are times that this isn't enough. Accountants have tax seasons, businesses have the ends of the financial year and teachers have exam seasons. During the exam seasons, I teach two or three times more than I usually do. That means much less time with JED. When they were much younger and my sense of obligation was much greater than my sense of affection for them, I felt more guilt than anything when the peak season hit. These days, it's different. In the last 5 1/2 years I have developed a serious love affair with JED and I am resentful when anything takes me away from them for an extended period of time.
At an outing to the beach with my aunt once, I lamented that these were the things I would miss when I went back to work. Her response was that I did these things because I did go to work and had I not been going to work, it would be unlikely that I would put in so much effort into taking them out.True that.
So, when it is crunch time like this, I feel more of a need to do something special with them; perhaps to compensate for the little time I have to spend with them. Last week, I took two hours out and went hunting for organic sausages to make our "Sausage Monsters". This week, I decided I was going to organise a play date. It wasn't going to be a play date where the kids just came together to play, although that would be fun too, but a painting play date. JED love mucking about with paint. We have a big stairway area that serves as their 'mucking about' place. I had also found online a craft store called CraftPlay; they sold castles made out of recycled box materials and I thought it would be fun for JED and their friends to paint them all. There would be enough to go around. On top of that, when I wrote to Craft Play telling them that I needed the castles for a play date, they sent me two additional towers. Evan took possession of those towers and declared them the guard posts (he doesn't know the word sentry yet).
Jordan, Chloe (our neighbour), Faith (Jordan's friend), Evan and Muffin were vibrating on the spot rearing to go as I got things ready. Excited little children make great helpers as we lay brown paper on the ground and got them to tape the pieces together. That way, they could sit on relatively clean floor, we protect the floor and they had additional surfaces to paint on.
There was little bickering as each busied themselves painting the various towers. Occasional bits of conversation involved discussing which part of the castle it was that they were busy with; the Queen's bedroom (Jordan), the dining room (Faith), the dungeon (Evan).
At the end of it, I asked each little one what they had most fun with.
Jordan: Painting with my friends and making every wall of my tower a different colour.
Evan: Painting under the umbrellas and mixing the water till it got yucky! (The rain was coming in and rather than move the entire exercise somewhere else, I put out big golf umbrellas so that they could hide under it.
Faith: The big bowls of paint and the cheese bunnies (Cheese bunnies were the snack of choice)
Chloe: Painting under the umbrella and painting big towers. Easy to paint.
Muffin: Paint on my feet!
By the end of it, there was paint on all the surfaces, faces, legs, arms, hands and feet. But the final product was bright and in happy colours. Each was proud of what they had done and told anyone who would listen what they had done.
The other mommies were all happy because the kids had been occupied for the previous two hours and they were hungry and cooperative when they went home. As for the JED kids, they were clamouring for another play date like that, with friends and with big pieces of stuff that they could pain.
For me, I had to go; had to take a shower, had no time for dinner and had to catch the train to work. But as I left the house, JED happily waved at me across their dinner bowls and I felt at peace, that I had had my fun with them and I could go to work in happy albeit exhausted peace.
So, what do I think of the Full Time Work Mom schtick? I don't love it but it is my lot in life now. I am thankful that my current job, while requiring me to work ridiculous hours, also gives me little time outs to plan and do things with JED. It is a lot about assuaging my own guilt and resentment. Packrat assures me that they don't mind that I am not around (in fact, they enjoy the fact that the Nazi task master disguised as their mom is occasionally absent and they get to run amok!). But when I know that they are happy and they know that Mommy loves them, I am okay to leave them and go to work.
Updated:
When we sent pictures of our craft date to Craft Play, they were most thrilled. As a thank you, they're sending us another set of castles.
Since we've had our fun with our castle painting, we're passing this on to a reader who promises to make some kid's / kids day by letting them muck about and throw some paint onto a castle.
We're going to pick a winner for this somewhat randomly, as long as;
1. You leave a comment below, answering the following question, that will most likely feed into our latent fantasies.
- If you could live in a castle and design a room or a suite or rooms, how would you do so?-
When I asked Jordan this, she said she wanted it rainbow coloured.
2. "Like" the CraftPlay page on Facebook here
3. Share the FB link you saw this post on!
We're going to let you channel the Duchess of Cambridge and Martha Stewart for a week and choose a reader to give the castle away to next Monday, the 25th of March 2013.
---
And we have a winner!
We've decided it to give it to the reader who thought about indulging herself instead of her kids. It's always good to dream for ourselves once in a while!
Anyway, Adora Tan, consider your dream heard. Now, if only we knew Santa!
So CraftPlay will have to do. They will be in touch with you soon!
Technorati Tags: JED, FTWM, play date, Craft Play
Those portions of time are known as 'protected time' by my bosses and they know that should they hazard to call during those times, they are likely to get an Ondine who is frazzled, stand off-ish and makes no qualms about sounding like she needs to get off the phone. The nature of my job can end up with me working round the clock even if I don't head into the office; that is why the 'protected time' is necessary.
Unfortunately, there are times that this isn't enough. Accountants have tax seasons, businesses have the ends of the financial year and teachers have exam seasons. During the exam seasons, I teach two or three times more than I usually do. That means much less time with JED. When they were much younger and my sense of obligation was much greater than my sense of affection for them, I felt more guilt than anything when the peak season hit. These days, it's different. In the last 5 1/2 years I have developed a serious love affair with JED and I am resentful when anything takes me away from them for an extended period of time.
At an outing to the beach with my aunt once, I lamented that these were the things I would miss when I went back to work. Her response was that I did these things because I did go to work and had I not been going to work, it would be unlikely that I would put in so much effort into taking them out.True that.
So, when it is crunch time like this, I feel more of a need to do something special with them; perhaps to compensate for the little time I have to spend with them. Last week, I took two hours out and went hunting for organic sausages to make our "Sausage Monsters". This week, I decided I was going to organise a play date. It wasn't going to be a play date where the kids just came together to play, although that would be fun too, but a painting play date. JED love mucking about with paint. We have a big stairway area that serves as their 'mucking about' place. I had also found online a craft store called CraftPlay; they sold castles made out of recycled box materials and I thought it would be fun for JED and their friends to paint them all. There would be enough to go around. On top of that, when I wrote to Craft Play telling them that I needed the castles for a play date, they sent me two additional towers. Evan took possession of those towers and declared them the guard posts (he doesn't know the word sentry yet).
Jordan, Chloe (our neighbour), Faith (Jordan's friend), Evan and Muffin were vibrating on the spot rearing to go as I got things ready. Excited little children make great helpers as we lay brown paper on the ground and got them to tape the pieces together. That way, they could sit on relatively clean floor, we protect the floor and they had additional surfaces to paint on.
There was little bickering as each busied themselves painting the various towers. Occasional bits of conversation involved discussing which part of the castle it was that they were busy with; the Queen's bedroom (Jordan), the dining room (Faith), the dungeon (Evan).
At the end of it, I asked each little one what they had most fun with.
Jordan: Painting with my friends and making every wall of my tower a different colour.
Evan: Painting under the umbrellas and mixing the water till it got yucky! (The rain was coming in and rather than move the entire exercise somewhere else, I put out big golf umbrellas so that they could hide under it.
Faith: The big bowls of paint and the cheese bunnies (Cheese bunnies were the snack of choice)
Chloe: Painting under the umbrella and painting big towers. Easy to paint.
Muffin: Paint on my feet!
By the end of it, there was paint on all the surfaces, faces, legs, arms, hands and feet. But the final product was bright and in happy colours. Each was proud of what they had done and told anyone who would listen what they had done.
The other mommies were all happy because the kids had been occupied for the previous two hours and they were hungry and cooperative when they went home. As for the JED kids, they were clamouring for another play date like that, with friends and with big pieces of stuff that they could pain.
For me, I had to go; had to take a shower, had no time for dinner and had to catch the train to work. But as I left the house, JED happily waved at me across their dinner bowls and I felt at peace, that I had had my fun with them and I could go to work in happy albeit exhausted peace.
So, what do I think of the Full Time Work Mom schtick? I don't love it but it is my lot in life now. I am thankful that my current job, while requiring me to work ridiculous hours, also gives me little time outs to plan and do things with JED. It is a lot about assuaging my own guilt and resentment. Packrat assures me that they don't mind that I am not around (in fact, they enjoy the fact that the Nazi task master disguised as their mom is occasionally absent and they get to run amok!). But when I know that they are happy and they know that Mommy loves them, I am okay to leave them and go to work.
Updated:
When we sent pictures of our craft date to Craft Play, they were most thrilled. As a thank you, they're sending us another set of castles.
Since we've had our fun with our castle painting, we're passing this on to a reader who promises to make some kid's / kids day by letting them muck about and throw some paint onto a castle.
We're going to pick a winner for this somewhat randomly, as long as;
1. You leave a comment below, answering the following question, that will most likely feed into our latent fantasies.
- If you could live in a castle and design a room or a suite or rooms, how would you do so?-
When I asked Jordan this, she said she wanted it rainbow coloured.
2. "Like" the CraftPlay page on Facebook here
3. Share the FB link you saw this post on!
We're going to let you channel the Duchess of Cambridge and Martha Stewart for a week and choose a reader to give the castle away to next Monday, the 25th of March 2013.
---
And we have a winner!
We've decided it to give it to the reader who thought about indulging herself instead of her kids. It's always good to dream for ourselves once in a while!
Anyway, Adora Tan, consider your dream heard. Now, if only we knew Santa!
So CraftPlay will have to do. They will be in touch with you soon!
Technorati Tags: JED, FTWM, play date, Craft Play
