Tabula Rasa

Now that I'm back at work, I have even less time to think about blogging much less to actually blog. On occasion though, I am inspired to blog about something and have every intention to do it when I find the time to. The problem is that when I actually do sit down to blog, my mind is blank. Ironically, blank, like a newborn's memory.

I was warned when I was pregnant that one of the effects that the hormones would have on me was that it would screw with my mind and not in the way where I stare for hours at my hand, fascinated and convinced that it is moving. I didn't really believe that pregnancy and the subsequent child birth would short circuit my short term memory until I started to walk into rooms with the full intention of doing something and then realising that I didn't really know what I was there to do. It's a strange sensation for someone who usually has a memory that can rival an elephant.

So I figured, I better start blogging more regularly even if it's about the mundane rather than not at all and have absolutely no recollection about what I had been doing. This is especially important since the one of the purposes of this blog is so that the kids will have something to read and there won't be much to read if I sit around and wait to blog but blank out along the way.

Anyway, snippets from the past week that I can remember.

1. It is unnecessary to buy toys.

My children have made friends with tissue paper. Tissue paper stands as the cheapest and most effective distractor for them. Throw out the rattles and noisemakers, just have tissue that moves and it captivates them for minutes on end.

2. My daughter is a water baby.

She has come away from the screaming new born who hated her clothes taken off because it was often a precursor to getting herself wet. Now, the opposite is true. Put her in the tub and she'll kick her Michelin legs around. She's also slowly learning to splash around and has no qualms getting water on her face. At the same time, I'm not about to wipe every single droplet of water off her face. A friend's daughter hates water on her face with a passion and this originated from the fact that her caregivers would freak out and make a big fuss about the one tiny drop of water on the girl's face. Anyhow, Baby J enjoys her morning bath time so much that the minute you lift her onto the towel, high decibelled howls emanate from that little body and don't really come to a stop until her blessedly short memory allows her to forget that she was in the tub ten minutes ago.

3. Evan the Rocket.

Both twins have super legs and they show it by kicking me in the belly and in the boobs. They especially like doing it when I have full boobs ready to be expressed. Packrat said it was because we wished for ballet dancers and basketball players and they are just starting early. I'd agree with him but I'm too busy gingerly rubbing my C-section wound that didn't hurt right up till round about the time that the two babies decided to use my belly as a launch pad.

Now, not only do they use my belly as a launch pad, they use anything, the mattress, the changing table, their pillows...thankfully they haven't discovered using one another yet. This has caused us to watch them all the more closely, especially Evan who seems to have Bionic legs that will probably serve him well when he has to do Standing Broad Jumps. Anyhow, we got a taste of how dangerous his Super-Legs can be. 2 mornings ago, I'm up and outside making him formula (which takes about a minute compared to warming up breast milk which takes about 4). Anyway, I could hear him fussing but all of the sudden the fussing gave rise to a huge pitiful wail. I rush in to see him sobbing in Packrat's arms and Packrat soothing him. Apparently, lil' Super-Legs had pushed off so hard, he had rocketed himself off the mattress that he was sleeping on and onto the floor. Thankfully the mattress is a 6 inch mattress that was placed on the ground so he didn't really hurt himself except for giving himself and us a big big scare. It was a great way to get babied because we rocked him, kissed him, soothed him and took him to bed with us after that.

So, now Evan sleeps in the baby equivalent of a padded cell so that should he decide to launch himself into orbit again, he'd richochet off the sides back into the safe confines of his mattress.

4. Jordan and breastfeeding

Jordan has always been schizophrenic when it comes to her feeding habits. We went through a stressful period when she was 6 weeks old where she refused to take the breast and only wanted the bottle. This made me feel very useless as a mother. Then, after that, she decided the nipple was what she wanted. This meant she'd politely drink enough to fill her rumbling tummy and then look around for me or more importantly, my boobs. This went back and forth quite a bit and it was quite frustrating at times especially because I couldn't be anywhere in the vicinity of her because she'd sniff me out.

Now, she allows me to give her the bottle and now, the breastfeeding I do is more for my benefit that for her. The problem is at this point, she has decided the bottle is better. She'll still take the boob but the minute the "let down" occurs and she chokes and sputters, she decides it's not worth milk coming out of her nose (and it has before!). She'll still take the nipple because I think it's familiar and a source of comfort, but she'll alternate between suckling and unlatching causing milk to be all over the place- on her face, in her hair, on my clothes, on my bed, everywhere but in her belly.

I might still stick with it and try but I think I need to accept the fact that she's slowly showing her preference. I know the Breastfeeding Nazi would say it's my fault since I introduced the bottle to her 4 months ago but I don't care. The bottle saved my sanity then and has continued to help me preserve it now. I just have to find other ways to hang out with her. Thankfully, she's getting easier and extremely fun to chat with so there're other ways to spend time with her.

5. Flip and turn

We expected the two to flip and turn soon. We expected Jordan to do it before Evan because she's more tenacious and dogged in her efforts. Evan's pretty much "oh, if I discover it, great! If I don't, there's always tomorrow to try". And if we were betting people, we'd have won because Jordan did indeed turn over on her own. You put her on her front and walk out to get her pacifier only to come back to her resembling a little beached whale with her belly up. I have not seen her in the midst of flipping but I'm always there to see the result. Evan succeeded his attempt to turn over two days ago. It saw him flipping over, right onto the grills of the cot and resulted in having his head wedged in a corner and him fussing and still trying tunnel forward. It was akin to watching a car stuck in mud trying to rev itself out of it.

Hilarious.

6. The need for speed

My friend Debbie while doing some spring cleaning sometime back unearthed a running pram. She said it was between throwing it away and giving it to someone who might use it. She thought of me because in my previous life, I used to run. Anyway, I gladly took it. In the last few weeks, we've begun using it. I would take the twins, one at a time on long walks, sometimes hour long ones, just to get out of the house. I was surprised that they took so well to the pram because they don't really like their twin one all that much. Packrat's theory is this pram, made for running has better suspension, makes for a better ride and is faster. Evan loves it, he falls asleep within minutes. As for Jordan, it depends on her mood, but she too is generally quite chill about hanging in the ride.

7. Jordan the Ostrich

The twins have favourite ways of falling asleep. It usually requires us to be carrying them. Evan rubs his face vigouroulsy into your chest before settling down to sleep. Jordan squirms and whimpers until she finds the just right position which is often face down with her head wedged between my body and the crook of my arm. So from the top, she looks like an ostrich who has stuck her head into a hole. My mother claims that, like the ostrich, her mentality is that if she doesn't see the world out there, no one can see her and she can go to sleep. Some nights ago, being very tired and somewhat whiny myself, I caught myself doing the same thing, burrowing into my pillows till my world was dark, soft and consisted of nothing else but me. Only then did I fall asleep. So it is true, she takes after me, in disposition as well as in sleep behaviour. How funny.

The last few need pictures and I will add in the photos when I have time. For now, I have suitably cleared my mind. In a way, this post has acted as my pensieve and these memories have been retained for the twins and for me to use against them when they bring home their dates.


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