Crash and Burn

Everyone who knows me knows I am particular about what the twins eat. And today, it was shown that it was for good reason. Today was the twins' school concert. We were looking forward to it because we have two little performers and thought it would be hilarious to see them ham it up on stage. That video will be shown once Packrat downloads it and works out the kinks.

The problem was the entire concert experience put me into a foul mood. It all started with each of us having to pay $68 to attend the concert because there was food served and it was at a swanky club. Even college prom nights at 5 star hotels didn't cost that much. Then there was the time. Most kids nap in the afternoon but the concert started at 12 and ended at 4. Because it started at 12, I had initially asked if we needed to feed the children before sending them in. I was told no, they'd be fed. I later found out, their idea of feeding them was to give them salty Japanese crackers and DOUGHNUTS.

We didn't see the children till they were led on stage and the both of them were front and centre and grooving quite nicely to the music although Evan seemed to be like a jack rabbit on speed, jumping and hopping none stop. The problem was that didn't stop when they came off stage.



They couldn't sit still, they thought everything was funny and they took to the stairs up and down without seeming to tire. I told Packrat this must be what it is like to be hopped up on speed. My worry was that with this sort of high, you really didn't want to be there when they came down from it. I was already throwing a hissy fit in my mind because I knew that it was the fault of the doughnuts. Packrat thought that perhaps the entire environment caused them to be like that but I was quite ready to lay all the blame on the doughnuts. If you watch the video very closely, Evan is constantly a big blur. The only reason why Jordan is more in focus is that she wanted to be near me so she didn't take off the way her brother did although she'd been as equally capable of his trippy shenanigans.

When I asked Jordan, in between her jelly bean bounces what she had for lunch, she told me doughnuts and crackers. I asked her if she was hungry and she said yes. She wanted rice. The girl is like me, when I eat too much that is sweet, I need to balance it off with something savoury. I also decided it was time to put my $68 to good use and get something off the buffet table. I was thwarted by the banquet captain who snootily refused to allow me to go near the buffet table even though my 2 year old needed food. That was when I felt that enough was enough and I was leaving with the twins in tow.

Like Cinderella's carriage, it was fast approaching the midnight hour where it would change back into a pumpkin and the twins would hit the wall and come down from their sugar high. As it was, twice, the tail end of Jordan chuckling and guffawing was her dissolving into tears over simple things like washing her filthy black feet or taking off her costumes. It hit us in full force when we got home when the tears turned to screams and screeches as we tried to take off their make up, change them out of their costumes, wipe them down and generally get them to bed.

Dealing with two 2 year olds on a good day is tiring enough. On a day when the screaming is in surround sound, NOT. FUNNY. At that point, I was ready to go back and kick and yell at someone from school for having as much wisdom as Paris Hilton for feeding my 2 year olds doughnuts in possibly what was copious by their standards (according to Jordan, she had 2 doughtnuts! )

Eventually, they calmed down enough and fell off to sleep from exhaustion but by then, I was tired, stressed and pretty sure that I had had a couple of non-Braxton-Hicks contractions in between chasing them up and down the stairs, trying to catch them, wash them up and having to calm down the two little gremlins as they fought their transformation back to harmless sleepy Mogwais.

On some days, it's nice to be proven right, but this wasn't one of those days. It wasn't worth it for the twins to go through such a sugar high just to crash so badly. It probably drove home the point to the twins' grandparents as they recoiled in terror as their darling grandchildren gnashed their teeth and clawed at anyone who tried to go near them.

And if I, a mother of just 2 1/2 years knows sugar is a bad idea, I can't help but figure why pre-school teachers, supposedly trained in child development and early childhood development had no better sense than to do something this stupid.

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