Daylight Robbery

I was always warned that having kids would be an expensive endeavour.

At first, I thought it had to do with the pre-natal fees. Everytime I saw my Ob-gyn, the bill came into the hundreds. My credit card points have never been higher.

Then, I thought it was the birth. Because I had twins and because it was an Emergency C-section owing to the minute-a-part contractions, it came up to almost enough to buy a Chery QQ.

During the first month, I thought the expensive nature came from the type of food one ate during confinement as well as the expert confinement care that I had.

Wrong again.

Through the last 8 months, I figured it was the constant diapering, the occasional tin of formula and the clothes, car seats, high chairs, toys and various paraphernalia that child rearing required.

Once again, wrong.

It would be infant and pre-school education. Like every other proud parent, Packrat and I believe that we have intelligent children and would like to do all we can to help them develop their smarts. We talked about how to and how not to do it. We decided that we weren't going to leave it to videos to continuously educate our two. When we'd decided on some things, we balked at the cost of achieving them.

1. Flash Cards (Glen Domain- apparently the best out there)- costs $150- $250 second hand (I don't know how much it is full price) even if it's MANY flashcards. Gai offered to make them for us but she lives in a different country.

2. Gymboree/ Swimming/ Kindermuzik Parent Child classes- $380- 630 / term for 45 minutes each class.

3. Infant education classes like those at Julia Gabriel- $1020 / 10 lessons.

Now, this is expensive and will eat us out of house and home. Especially since all these costs double for me unless we do the cruel thing and pick only one to attend the classes and call it a sociological experiment.

And not only is the cost bordering on crazy and insane, there's also the other problem of having the money but having no school to go to. It was my mistake but I thought it was only in New York where new born babies were put on wait lists for child care/ kinder classes. But apparently, it's happening here too. In fact, a colleague of mine got berated for ringing so late to put her child on the list. And even though the infant was but a month old at that point, the administrator told her off for being so delinquent. She also seemed to have gained great joy in informing my colleague that her month old infant was at the bottom of a very very long wait list.

We're torn as to what to do about our children's academic and intellectual development. We could let them develop on their own. We could attempt to stimulate them at home with hand made toys and whatever toys we have or we could spend thousands of dollars on flash cards and classes to do it though it probably won't guarantee anything except make them sick. I'm inclined to do the former although both of us work and have so much work to do after work that I don't know where we will find the time to.

But then again, it'll be great to see them learn and to imaginatively make toys for them like what my mom did for me. She used to make hand puppets for me, put up puppet theatre, give me huge jars of poster paint, make play dough out of flour, water and colouring...I think that's where some of my existential angst comes from. I want to do all that my mom did for me but we can't afford for me to stay at home even if it's part time. But being at work means I have to fulfil work expectations which basically leave me enough energy to come back and hug and kiss my children but not have enough to stimulate them at the level I want to. I would however like to take them to one of these parent child classes because I think it's great fun to do things just us, the parents and the children, in an environment away from home. I just haven't reconciled the cost yet. Plus I'm told it's more important to teach them a sense of irony.

Till then, they get story books, lots of songs sung to them (some albeit in a foreign accent), toys of different textures and lots of space to learn to crawl and walk at home. I guess we'll revisit the more costly alternatives when the former cease to entertain or stimulate them. Although the kiasu in me worries that by that point, I won't be able to get the kids into anywhere decent.

Ah, to have money to do anything and everything for the children.

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